#68.I'm going crazy.

Lalelaliloo...wahaha, I've nothing to blog for these days except today's dinner is good :) thanks xy and family :) Hohoho!(the waiter is cute, hee) And, sorry rene for leaving early and thanks for your ST :D

Lalela... should i go out tmr or visit the doctor to get my MC for tues?
Hmmmm.

I need to go off to do some mechanics, Mother's nagging.

Goodnight & Byee! :)

#64. Out of the Blue.

I miss 2003. Hm.

The Airport Chocolate - Baci, Chocolate in a Love Note.

这是一则我很喜欢的文章，就在昨天早报副刊，不妨欣赏...

时与空之间 Greenwich Mean Time 的逻辑规划

Ⅲ

我还处在你的昨天，
而你已进入了我的明天。

你一直在那边，我一直在这边。你我之间隔着9小时的时间距离。想起你时是我这里晚间10点31分。我还处在你的昨天，而你已进入了我的明天。然而，此时此刻，我正在想你，却因为时间单位的划分把你我分隔在不同的时间线上。人为的。

10月31日，根据国际裁定，这一天，冬季正式抵步。因此，需要调整这里的时间，把时间挪后一个小时。我需要提早一个小时开始我新的一天，而我们之间因为国际的裁定而必须分隔多一个小时，虽然实质上好像没有改变什么，却又好像有什么改变了。每一年，我们的四季已经被划分好，哪一月，哪一天才算是正式季节的抵步，为的是更好地组织我们的社会。于是，作为社会结构中小小的组成单元，我们必须遵守各种规范。包括迎接季节的态度。于是，我必须耐心等到明年的夏天才能回到我们之间8个小时的时间距离。

Ⅵ

Internet的模棱两可

解读你和解读你的情感变成了一场文字解析。

因为地理上的距离，所以我们的关系一直悬在互联网上的空间里。这个空间是无限的，所以很接近，也可以很遥远。于是，我们必须透过这个虚拟的空间来传递真情或编织谎言。解读你和解读你的情感变成了一场文字解析。你就存在于那个12寸荧光屏里的字里行间。有时候，我没有把握诠释得准确无误，因为文句出现了歧义句，让我无所适从，不知应该选择哪一边的诠释角度。不论选择哪一个角度，始终存有另一个可能性的空间。结果，在这样漫无边际、毫无限制的互联网空间里，我们之间还多了一层的诠释空间。

对着荧光屏书写感想，书写自己的情感，针对着你的来函回复。有时候有一种错觉，以为自己是在进行学术报告，消化资料，然后进行分析、整理、提出意见、寻找例证辩驳。结果，情感通过文字的替代后有一种思维过滤后的理性，有一种理论性质的倾向。于是，我们可能谈论的是一场理性化的感情，一种理想化或唯美后的情感。因为这样，有时候，即使是自己的真情，也是一种自以为是的美化而已。可能离百分百的真实还有一段距离。这便是互联网空间里的限制。

然而，即使这样，隔着如此多层的时空距离，我们还是能够争吵、指责、赌气。

Ⅸ

Search后的落寞

信箱变得冰冷的时候，只能打开属于你的文件夹，在你过去的来函中取暖。

当inbox里开始没有你的名字出现后，电邮突然失去了功能以及意义。再多的来函塞满了来函信箱，始终是一种空洞的姿态而已。以为频繁地查阅电邮就可能会出现奇迹，可以突然发现你的名字。

信箱变得冰冷的时候，只能打开属于你的文件夹，在你过去的来函中取暖。当你的文件夹也无法填满空洞的心灵时，只能无可奈何地寻找你的踪迹。徒然地。上网站，在各个Search Engine中输入你的名字和你可能的代号，发给虚拟的全世界。即使20页都印满了你的名字，却都不是你。然而，谁才是你？于是，在Search Engine中输入了自己的姓名，结果是No such results found.原来自己并不属于这个虚拟中的真实世界。


Ⅻ

Reformat的可能性

在虚拟年代的面前时，我们比任何时候都要更坚强。

我把你我之间的所有交流和e卡都存入电脑的硬盘里。仿佛我们的一切只能存在于虚无的空间里，以一种虚无的方式证明那一切的存在。有时候，连我自己也会怀疑，时空对岸的你是谁，时空彼岸的我真的会是我吗？

这个年代，很多事物都不堪一击。实体的、抽象的是这样；电脑软件、硬件也无异；真实的、虚假的都可以被击毁。有一天，电脑病毒不请自来。结果硬盘中你我之间的来函和你的邮址因为虚拟的空间而存在的一切也因为虚拟空间中的虚拟病毒而消失在虚拟的空间里。我们之间的真情、谎言、误解是否也能随着病毒的来袭而一笔勾销？

重新装置电脑软件，一切仿佛还原了。只是已经找不到我们之间过去的任何蛛丝马迹。在电脑空荡荡的硬盘里，我们是否能就此重新开始或是借机遗忘？

在虚拟的年代里，我开始发现，不管你在哪一边，我都必须单枪匹马应战。即使战死战场，也只是一场虚空的战事。被敌人割下了头颅，淌着鲜血，敌人胜利地掀起了头盔，才发现头盔底下的那个人原来是我自己。

在虚拟年代的面前时，我们比任何时候都要更坚强。

With courteousy, zaobao.com, by 阿龙

*

I think I better be off to do some work to keep occupied. :)
Goodnight and goodbye.

#64. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

你就是我心中唯一美丽的神话

I was dragged to watch HP unprepared today. It was fairly good, not yet the best movie though as I thought it was too dark, and the casts are getting old making the movie heavy after watching. And again, like other readers who stepped into the cinema wondering which parts will excluded and walk out feeling disappointed, I feel likewise. But overall, it was good and worth another watch, to appreciate it as well as the have a better understanding from the weird cutting.

Anyway, new books to be read added to the list:

1. Freakonomics: A Rouge Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything by
Steven D.L. & Stephen J.D.,
2. Man and Wife by Tong Parson,
3. Stories We Could Tell by Tony Parson,
4. Girl with a Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier,
5. Middlesex: A Novel by Jeffrey Eugenides.

And movies too:

1. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe,
2. Memoirs of a Geisha,
3. Perhaps Love,
4. Aeon Flux,
5. Pride and Prejudice,
6. The Promise.

What a wonderful holiday, goodnight (:

#63. 21-07-1940

我喜欢早晨的坟场。一丝幽幽的凄凉，淡淡的寂寞。
每当微风缕缕掠过，柳树仿佛在风中飘浮，飘移这沉重的忧愁。
在这里，我的情感在悲伤之中得到了解脱。

*

今生能遇见自己的所爱，是福气。
要若能携手走过数十年的岁月，更是一世的幸福。
爱情能战胜一切，即使赢了生离，却总输给死别。

幸好，回忆宛在。
回忆，它战胜了岁月。

*

如果明天是永远，
爱，到了今天，便是地久天长。
即使明天的你将离我而去，
爱恋，到了今天，便是幸福。

#63. Yesterday/Today/Tomorrow

原来我也忘了。

我忘了原来自己也软弱。

#62. Yesterday's

I'll make a lousy girlfriend someday cos' my stars really suck. I cannot fold proper stars for goodness' sake and there seems to be so many empty bottles at home that I cannot stand leaving bottles stand empty.

My room's clean again from the promos mess, Yeah! A month to clean up is long and I threw away really lotsa things today- things of 2003, 2004 and 2005. Can u imagine all that rahrah adding up to like 1 metre high of papers? and like more than $500 worth of books and assessments? Yeps, all into the bin and I'm so happy throwing things away cos' you always get the burden off your shoulder feeling :)

Anyway, this song always reminds me of the 1930s and I really love the 1930s.

忘不了忘不了
忘不了春已尽
忘不了花已老
忘不了离别的滋味
也忘不了那相思的苦恼

-- 《不了情》 邓丽君 (listen)

And needless to say, I really love Theresa Teng too :) but i prefer Chai Qin's version of it. (listen)


Goodnight

#61.Your Only Glimpse of Me.

I've given up hope trying to change a template. I just get so sick of not having ideas, editting a background picture too big(or small) or even trying to find a suitable one. I tried getting ready-made ones too, even though its like wasn't really my style(originality?), but they keep failing me as well. Grr. So..., no choice just stick to this which I love dearly too.

Anyway, I've removed the music cos' I found it really irritating after a while. :S And if you're really that observant, I changed the blog title too :) Yes, this is your only glimpse of me.

6 more weeks to being a year 2, I guess I should really start pulling my socks and do real work. But you know this tomorrow sickness that you just cannot help getting when you stop doing work for a while? Ya, my work is always for tomorrow.

Limin: This is a post, although its like damn Idontknowwhattosay. My entries just suck nowadays. :(

Goodnight.

#60. At The Hub

My internet connection back at home is down for a few days cos' I actually forgot my password for my Singnet broadband and so all I can do now is to wait patiently for 3 working days in which they will send my resetted password back to me. Groan!

OMG, I love Geishas!!!! Ok, thats my after effect of Memoirs of a Geisha :) And I've got a new book Geisha and my long waited Living History of Hillary Rodham Clinton from TJ Library!!! I can't wait to read read read and read my boring hols away :) Its not that I'm boosting but I just love TJ's library cos' I cannot seem to find them in any another National Libraries. :(

Ok, I shall stop here till my connection@home comes back on again :) meanwhile I'll be off to MPL to mug.

Ciao.

#59. I have finally let you go.

Reading her entry almost made me cry, I don't know why.

I guess this is what it is all about - forgiving, understanding, the for-your-happiness-I-let- you-go, the elements of love.

I feel like I need a soul search, for the very thing that I'm escaping from. I feel like I'm escaping from something and yet for very long, I cannot figure out what that is.

And I was so ashamed that I didnt know how to love, at all.

Be strong girl :)

#58. The Singbento

The music cd industry in Singapore seems to be pathetically standard.Everybody listen to the same songs, buy the same CD. I went to a few music cd shops a few days ago for a particular CD and even to the extend of music stores to see if they have actually imported the mainland version of it(the CD was released in Mainland mah), legally or not and this was what I got:

Me: “ 嗨，请问你们有买汪佩蓉的 CD 吗？”
Sales Assitant: “王佩蓉”？
Me: “哦，汪佩蓉。那个唱 《只要你快乐》的，radio 每次播的... ...”
Sales Assistant: “是老歌手还是新歌手 huh ?”
Me: “新的啦，专辑刚出不久而已...”
Sales Assistant : *catch no ball*

And thus, I still cannot find the CD.
But 汪佩蓉 do sing beautifully, especially her 《只要你快乐》, try listening to it somewhere ok? :)

Ok, its very late already and my OP is in like 6 hours time. Yeah!

Goodnight :)

我要你快乐
随时都为你保留我的问候
从此面对往事而无动于衷
不管我追求什么害怕什么
再见也可以夺走一字不留

#57. 故事中的我们,在演自己的人生

如果生命对每个人
都不公平也没道理
那就让我带着孤寂
继续前进直到光明

*

Woosh! I've just finished I&R and my darling OP. Look at the time now --> its almost 2am! :)
I just love being occupied. Hah!

Hai, the tkd gang is away on camp, the c&Ks are either at work or school, 06ers? Hm. I'm bored.

2 more days before PW finally comes to an end, its time for rejoyce and yet it is not. Cos' by then I'll have nothing else to occupy me already! Grrr, just like what I told Fat the other day, being constantly busy throughout the year has kept me on the go for all these while, hah! I just cannot stay at home all day to rot 'cos my mind just keeps wondering off my stationary body. It wonders to Boon Lay then all the way back then to JB where XiaoShan must be now. I just cannot think so much!!! I'll go job hunting tmr, AGAIN.

Anyway, outings with family these days have made me realised some places I do love in Singapore apart from what I did say that no place in Singapore makes me feel like staying here. But there is now, haha, not 1 but 2. Geylang and Syed Alwi Road. Yes, the former is filled with China women earning a living on the streets (but there's yummy food too) and the latter, streets are so packed that you can barely walk in this Indian community. But I like adventurous places, places with old buildings, dirty, dark and dangerous streets and interesting people. I think I'm kinda lured by old-ness and uniqueness, haha. I want to go to the garage sale off SIM LIM and join the Blangadesh-s in their open air movie too :) But not for now cos', haha I guess no friend would share my interest. :)

Ok I need to get to bed for results slip tmr.



知足的快乐，叫我忍受心痛

#56.crAp

I've #59 posts in this blog whereas my entry count only makes up to 56. No wonder my Fmaths is a good old D. Hah!

A few things happened yesterday.
1) had a new pair of specs.
2) celebrated reynold's birthday @ marina (happy 17th big boy)
well, actually only 2, hah!

anyway, these days are rather 空虚 for me. i hate holidays and this post is rather redundant.

goodnight.

#55. 2046

“ 其实1224、1225，就是现生活实里的平安夜，每年到了那个晚上，很多人都特别需要 多一点的温暖，虽然那天晚上我自己没有得到， 但是无所谓了。看她那么开心，我也觉得高兴。”

"每个去2046的人都只有一个目的，就是找回他们失去的记忆，因为在2046这个地方，一切事物永不改变，没有人知道是不是真的，因为没有人从那里回来过。"

-<2046>

For more quotes, click here.

A very good movie and recommanded if you like slow, thought provoking ones.
But if you're the action packed or thriller lovers, then I'm sorry I think this movie makes no sense to you and you'll most probably fall asleep 5 mins into it.

More movies :) BYee.

#53. Just another day

Sometimes, we just refuse to accept the difference. Hai, I dont't want to say more. Hah.

Hmm, its 11 months into 2005 already. Happy November 2005. :)

God I've nth to post for goodness sake. It 3 days into the 2month long hols and I'm dead already.. bored to death. I've kinda finished all the movies I wanted from the cinema or the cheap-like-hell rental shop downstairs. I'll have nth to do once I finish 2 more korean drama series and my hols assignment. Die, Die, Die!

One day if I've the chance, I want to try dating older man. Hah! Right, M? :)