That April.

Everybody has their fair share of sorrow.

I feel like I'm losing him.
The signs are showing, the symptoms are surfacing.

Let us all be healthy and happy again.

Exams.

1st day of prelims.
19 chapters of econs.
ah yes, its time to get it started!

For the Regulars.

I feel like I've just finished an entire course of National Education after like 3 hours of research around the ministry and statutory board websites.

GP is a terrible thing to study and so being a very horrible GP student who doesn't want others to suffer like she does... I'm offering my regulars some of my research!!!

Though it might not be some extraordinary notes that might improve your grade by 1 or 2 bands, at least I summarised and CAP(copy and pasted) for the past 3 hours for it. Might be useful for "your country questions" so feel free to take a look. (:

Singapore Education.
Singapore Social Issues.

See, I told you its good to be my friend.
And of cos, to read my blog.

Goodnight world.
Mug hard everyone!

Life is good.

Its again the start of another ending.

There's 2 more days to study break, but school doesn't seem to cut down its toil on me; school work, revision, and all the stuffs being the class rep. Teachers' Day celebration for the yr2s are supposed to be on friday and I haven't have anything prepared. Its hard serving a class, believe me, especially when they're more than just dependent on you to get all that bullshit done.

I've just work through my sums on the topics I've yet to touch for the subjects. Physics was good, maths was alright, fmaths still need much catching up to do while econs my supposed best subject was atrocious as I haven't touched it at all. i don;t deny that I'm pressurising myself; mild pressure is good for health. Yet i think there's still a gap to being stress and I think some of you do know how amok I can run when things are too much for me to take. I've been there to know that I must not be.

Anyway, I've made up my mind to go back to school almost everyday in those breaks and the library on weekends. Home is still too much a distraction for me to put 15/24 into good practise.

It has been 1.5 hours since I gave up on trigo and I need to go back for more work.

Goodnight world.
Goodnight you.

We shall see again, soon.

The Ideal Husband.

Oh man. Oh man.
3 weeks to prelims. Are you feeling all the jitteries already?

Ah yes, I'm going to marry a gp tutor so hopefully my child wouldn't suffer doing the language like I do now.

Oh man.
Oh man.

But I do really want to marry a gp tutor if there's one suitable.

Yes, Yes, marry a gp tutor.

8 more days of school.

I don't mind a little more suffering on my part, its isn't like I haven't suffered before. Even if you do meant well, you need to know that its never too good of you to put words in my mouth. I do have my reasons for doing and not doing certain things.

Anyway, the week's 2 horrible tests are driving everyone crazy and so am I. The saddest thing is when I actually thought for the best day to pon school, there were no good days available cos my best day which is tomorrow has to be left for collection of yearbookmoney for my dear class.

Life seems good for me doesn't it?
Fortunately or not, it has to be.

New Perspectives.

:)

Holiday Blues.

Its a beautiful Thursday night. Parents are out watching 歌台 and iTunes is shuffling all my favourite songs. I do have a lot to complete for tonight - HwaChong's summary, 05prelim's AQ and my dear complex tutorial 4; but on a wonderful night like this, those things must wait. Yet I'm feeling guilty wasting 2 whole days doing only 1.5 papers, 1 year of mcqs and maybe 1 sucky summary.

I was surfing Friendster just now, saw lots of new photos- outings', classes'etc. I feel sour whenever I see things like this cos o6 is never likethat. Even if we did, its never a complete thing; don't talk about the chalets or supposed birthday celebrations which are done half hearted and superficially.

I've a whole class of people with big inspirations. Scholarships, overseas universities, wellknown organisations' careers, internships, you name it, they want and can want it. I don't mean they're not good if fact they're things that not everyone can aim for. Sometimes I just feel like I'm too ordinary in comparison when I don't want to achieve so much in my mere 18 years of life, or maybe when I don't get to achieve that much.

Just like what I told Lum a few months ago: 如果十年后要结婚摆喜酒，看看今天班上的那些人，还真不知道该请谁来好-那个还会记得，那个还会bother,有时候我还真的不知道。Everyone says pre-u life was good and is gonna be the best times of one's life, I wonder why mine turned out this way. Sometimes I wonder what I'll really remember of today five years down the road- maybe its the bits and pieces of tkd, the everything that we went through, maybe its the pathetic HK trip that almost bonded the clique. But isn't it at all pathetic that this is everything that I were to remember? There wouldn't be anything about o6 definitely; only if there is something to remember about when all you do is go to school, study and go back home every single day.

Oh yes, maybe I will remember how the class and the caring tutors inflicted tonnes of stress and pressure so much so that I dread going to school every single morning.

Lucky me, school will be out in less than 2 mths time. Till then I'll finally be able to stop worrying about not playing my part at the class rep to do some class bonding.

Oh maybe you will think that I'm complaining too much to appreciate the things in life. But I still think I've a relatively sad life. HAHA, and sad people need to mug now.

Goodnight everyone.

Confessions of a Mountain Tortoise.

I must be a mountain tortoise.

Everybody thinks I'm a mugger.

Ok, I'm.

Oh wells.

Its National Day.

I need to go out.

I need to go out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

等待。

我不怕寂寞，只怕爱错。

illed?

I feel sick. I think it must be the more than just a few strands of fries I tried to steal from my brother earlier and the afternoon of simply doing nothing at all. If this the way the body reacts to a break after 3 weeks of non-stop mugging then it must be very funny!

I guess I need to get back to mugging so that hopefully the illness will go away for another intensive weekend.

"There was some open space between what he knew and what he tried to believe, but nothing could be done about it, and if you can't fix it you've got to stand it."
- Annie Proulx, Brokeback Mountain.

Test.

I don't want to feel this stupid.
I don't want this useless feeling.
I cannot help the worries.